Love is a natural and universal phenomenon. Probably, everyone experiences love in his/her life but the attitude and experience vary from person to person. Love is a fusion of strong emotions of attachment and affection. Attraction towards opposite sex is natural even in blood relations. Scientists also coined terms in this regard such as Electra complex (attraction of mother towards son) and Odible complex (attraction of father towards daughter). When a child enters in adult age the feelings of love reaches at peak and the adult becomes emotional and sensitive from time to time even for different persons during the teen age. The first sight love is very common in this age. Gradually, the bond of love becomes stronger and the individual gets involve in a relationship. While proceeding such type of relationship individuals get immense attachment which results to develop blind love. The relationship of love based on soaring emotions negates faults of the
partner and does not care about the set values of the society. However, love continues and most often the ultimate result is expectation of marriage. In some cases, the intention or willingness to have relationship of love is merely accomplishment of one’s sentiments.
Expectations are natural and fundamental component of love. People expect that lover would treat him/her as special one, will help in the uncertain circumstances, will take time out for his/her and will also give gifts. When such expectations look to be fulfilled the love grows up. Whereas the adverse situation hurts and creates anger which results to breakup. The one who involves in relationship of love contains feelings of intimacy and care for his/her beloved. Normally, the young adults fall in love due to sharp biological hormones or some other factors such as lust, loneliness and family desertion. They seek love and want to be cared of. When someone finds a person who denotes sincerity, care, honesty, and gives happiness he/she automatically gets involved with that person. In result of care and providing happiness the individual does not want to lose that special person which leads to develop strong emotional bonds.
Bulk amount of theories with context to love, attachment, such as intimacy versus isolation in adulthood described by Erik Erickson reveal the value of intimate relations in one’s life. Similarly, Abraham Maslow presented the theory of hierarchy of needs and demonstrated that love and belongingness has immensely important after accomplishment of biological and safety needs. There are various ways to express love. Some people express verbally with soft and sweet words and some demonstrate through their acts like helping in the problematic situation, giving gifts or flowers. Moreover, in Pakistan, expressing love through romantic poetry can be commonly observed. Number of reasons can be for a person to fall in love or make a relationship. It can be the beauty of beloved, good nature, ideal or similar personality, honesty or prestige. Furthermore, the feeling of love and attraction is not bound for race, color, caste, or creed. When a right person appears
the emotional attraction spontaneously evokes.
The chances to get involve in inter caste affairs and in extra marital relations are generally high among young adults. Although, the young adults know that their relationship with opposite sex would not be accepted by the parents and society due to cultural and religious bindings but they still involved. However, in result the ratio of elopement marriages is increasing day by day. The report published in 2012 reveals that seventeenth thousand elopement cases were registered in Pakistan while off the record cases would be countless. Additionally, the role of media is very prominent in this regard. The emotional attraction in opposite sex through songs, romantic movies and dramas that how love brings changes and shines one’s life are the commonly observed features of the media. Most often movies and songs present the dreamy and unrealistic picture of life which instigates the immature young adults to think and act like that. Therefore, this is one of the reasons for young adults to adopt such ways that are against the values of the society to fulfill their emotional and physical needs.
Love is an amalgamation of emotions and attraction towards opposite sex which is a part of human instinct. It is not awful in any context e.g. society or religion but the ways adopted by young adults creates disturbance in the social structure of the family and society as whole. In actual, there is no reality of love particularly in such circumstances where a variety of factors incite individuals to create legitimate or illegitimate relationship with opposite sex. Basically, it is a process of pursuing emotions.
The writer is a M.phil scholar and freelance columnist, can be reached at javed_amjad07@yahoo.com
